Eastern solutions to Western Problems
I've been having a lot of trouble with my mental health, and I've been doing a tremendous amount of work to try to improve it. I pretty much spend 90% of my time trying to support myself through each day, and 10% actually living.
But, I'm not here to talk about that. I wanted to write about the lure of eastern practices when all the things I'm doing aren't giving me the payoff they should.
I've always been a bit of a bitch when it comes to this kind of thing, like thinking that being an enlightened person is bullshit, or that wearing charms or chanting is terribly unrealistic and completely unscientific.
I'm now practicing mindfulness. I'm working through the three foundation packs of the Headspace app. I've read the first section of Mindfulness for Women. It's a western take on an eastern practice, and everywhere people are getting real results with it. So far, I'm not. But it might be working 1% of the time so I'm happy to keep at it until I can get up to 2%, then further from there.
So what's beyond mindfulness, now that I'm in the market for new solutions to my problems? I was at the best place if you're in the market for a little cultural appropriation the other week (Urban Outfitters) and I picked up a little trio of bracelets with 'crown chakra' on the label. They looked cute. One of them broke on the first day, obviously. Then I was waiting in the car one day with little else to do I decided to google the crown chakra.
From what I looked at on really badly designed websites in the ten minutes I had, I learned that it was the part of me that's connected to the world beyond my preoccupations. It's where I'll find my 'higher consciousness,' my wisdom, bliss, clarity, trust, devotion, inspiration, positivity and my connection with the formless and limitless. It was like a revalation. I need to work on every single one of those things.
So I'm trying to figure out where to go from here. I am now completely open to the idea of being a tourist in a world of self help that is outside what I would consider scientific. Maybe I can learn about meditating in a certain way that focuses on my crown chakra and helps me to get it sorted out. Maybe there's a whole new way of life out there for me that I can get started on.
It's something that for the next few days I can focus on. And I desperately need that, because on Friday I'm finally getting to discuss changing my medication with the doctor, and the wait has been excruciating so far and I'm only getting worse every day.